Saturday, April 16, 2005

Dreams

I tend to be a laid back kind of person. I mean, sure, sometimes even I get angry or annoyed or frustrated with the world around me, but as a general rule I try to be peaceful in my mind. Anyway, I was searching around on the internet today for someone that had a site or something posted about relaxation and surrealism and contedness. But I did not find anything. It seems everyone is looking for answers, or improvement, or a purpose. And for what!? It confuses me. Sometimes I like to just ignore everything, and assume that it's all just the way it's supposed to be. As a favorite Kender of mine once said "it's a problem that will be solved by wiser heads than mine. I'm along for the fun."
Why can't we all just be along for the fun? Why can't even a small percentage of the population be along for the fun?
Suddenly, it occurs to me. A small portion is just along for the fun. But we don't like to make waves or any of that. So we just hide in our little worlds, worried about everyone else stressing so much. Ah well, guess I have to just enjoy my life and let you all live yours. Well, let me start this blog now.

So relaxed. So laid back. It's 0045. I should be sleeping. But no, here I am in blogspot. It seems a good place to let go of my peaceful easy mind. I'm listening to some good old jazz standards. Though earlier I was listening to radioio ambient. Good stuff. It's like foreplay for the mind. Except, instead of turning you on, it relaxes you. It gets you in a peaceful meditative mood. After I listened to all that good music, I was looking up astrological symbols, and chinese symbols. I found many. And then I stumbled upon a symbol which really spoke to me. Well, okay, I don't know what the symbol means precisely, but I know that the title of the symbol spoke to me: Dream. And my mind suddenly kicked it's feet out, plopped down in its easy chair and went to town.
Ahhh, sweet release. Finally, in that little place where everything is perfect, and the world is big and full of fun and surprises. Every turn holds adventure and danger. Every avenue is a pathway to treasure and swashbuckling. Everything is exciting. I feel my skin tingle with that electricity that comes from expecting something great. And I have a foolish lopsided grin on my face. If I was a dog, my tongue would be hanging out. Oh, wait, it is. *grinz* Well, it's time to set off, then. Even in my office (yes, I'm at work at this unbelievable hour) I am on a journey. A journey from which I may not return, if I'm lucky. And straight ahead lies the cavern. A cavern where sound becomes reality. Mathematical paterns swirl out behind my eyelids and create a beautiful harmonious feeling. It doesn't confuse me. It makes more sense than ever.
I'm in that place I can only reach in the semi-conscious mind. That outer level of thought that you can never reach by thinking about it. You have to let go. Let your mind think for you. You have to just be carried along by the waves. But you can't quit. You still have to be there. Otherwise your mind goes, and you stay at home. Or in your office. And you just go with it. Oh, it's so relaxing, and so new, and so exciting. Maybe you don't know what I'm talking about. But that's your loss.
On the edge. The edge of thought. That void. Not even your dreams exist here. This is the tough-thinking part of the mind. Only reached by the truly intelligent. They go there, not on purpose, but every now and again, they feed a thought to their minds, and the mind does the rest. Suddenly your thoughts become a living, writhing, tangled mass of energy - pulsating, squirming, breathing, heaving - energy. It consumes all your thought. Any straying and it runs from you. And you have to ignore it to catch it again. Like in The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy: "If you look at it directly you won't see it unless you know precisely what it is. Your only hope is to catch it by surprise out of the corner of your eye." (Only there they are referring to an SEP or Somebody Else's Problem field.)

Well, this is a decent post for now, more later.